I'm reading a book that I had been intrigued by for years before I purchased it. It wasn't available in the local used book stores or the libraries. Nobody I knew owned a copy or had even read it. I was both drawn to it and hesitant to pick it up. Recently, I purchased a digital copy because it was on sale and I had credit with Amazon.
Usually, I devour a new book in hours. I am a rather voracious reader. This book is not one of those that I consume gleefully. I can't decide whether the writing style, the topic, or my own issues are slowing me down, but I'm reading it very slowly. It's both fascinating and uncomfortable with heavy prose. Some paragraphs are beautiful, and others repel me. I can't accept put the idea of the book fully, and I can't reject it either. Slowly, painfully, and in small doses, I'm working my way through the text. Each reading session leaves me pondering how much of the text should be internalized and utilized and how much should be rejected wholeheartedly.
Do you ever find yourself wrestling with the text you read? Does that struggle make you feel strong or does it expose your weakness. Does smaller doses help you digest the information, or does it prolong the agony? Do you just give up when a text weighs too heavily on your heart and mind?