Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Accepting the end

There is something to be said for fighting the good fight. In some situations, fighting as long and as hard as one can is the right the thing to do.  There are other times when we have to bow out with a little bit of grace. Recognizing the difference is a difficult thing to do.

I have a friend whose marriage has not been good for her, and now, she's decided to end it. She's tried therapy for her issues; she's tried couple's therapy, and she has tried suffering in silence for her kids' sake.  She has been supportive of her partner; she's tried changing who is. Nothing has made either of them happy. She's decided to end a relationship that makes her desperately unhappy, one that has drained her financially, spiritually, mentally, and physically.

She has embraced the knowledge that this is not fight worth continuing, and I am proud of her. Recognizing how unhealthy her life has become, she is choosing to let go of her anger and fear; she is making a change rather than trying to deny who she or her soon to be ex-husband is.

Accepting the end of a period in your life takes courage.  Sometimes, fighting and trying again and again is only going to prolong unhappiness, and when this is the case, it is very important to accept that being unhappy isn't good for us.  

2 comments:

  1. Experience here: In six months, she will come home one day and realize her shoulders aren't as heavy as they have been for the last few years. Letting go is crazy time, bitter can continue to boil up from the strangest places. Please remind her to be easy on herself because when the peace comes there's that strange desire to be angry at yourself for not letting go sooner.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hope you're right, and thanks for commenting.

      Delete

Please feel free to comment, share or ask questions, but please, keep comments in good taste and respectful.