Friday, December 30, 2011

Finding an upside

As you may know, I struggle with a form of clinical depression.  One of the ways I have learned to cope with a myriad of daily downers, is to find an upside, no matter how strange or silly.  It can serve as a good reminder that good and bad depends on perspective and that nothing is all misfortune.

A couple nights a go, I found an upside to migraines.  Weird, right?  I get migraines with visual disturbances (hallucinations, if you will).  While I was lying in bed in the middle of the night and contemplating getting up and finding my medication, I noticed that my visual disturbances are really rather pretty.  Closing my eyes, I lay there and enjoyed the colors and movements.  It's like watching an abstract watercolor painting that moves on it's own with pixie dust explosions.  After a while, I got up, added more ice to my ice pack and took a pill.  Then I went back to watching the artwork only I can see until I fell asleep.

While concentrating on the beauty of what I could see, I lost sight of my nausea and pain.  It was a great reminder that everything has an upside, if we look hard enough for it.

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