Friday, October 28, 2011

Is romance dead?

Somebody I am acquainted with posed a question a couple of weeks ago on Google +: Is romance dead?  I actually had to think about it, as my two knee jerk reactions were polar opposites.

My conclusion:  Romance isn't dead, it's just been idealized and dressed up so much that we have a hard time recognizing it. Romance changes over time, just as we do.  Romance, as it was in the time of courtly love, is pretty much dead; it would be nearly impossible for chaste love between a knight and married woman to survive our highly sexualised, transitional, and morally flexible society.  It also wouldn't be appreciated the way it once was.  Romance novel (a slightly more grown up version of fairy tale romance)love, probably has never really existed.  But there is still romance to be found, if we look for underneath the muck of daily life and naked of the exotic trappings of silk and roses.

Romance can be found in quiet evenings together.  It is definitely there when flowers are presented for no reason other than to make you smile.  Romance is the sweetness of memories held in common and visited fondly together.  It is reaching for your lover after a tragedy to affirm life in their warmth, and romance is being seen as beautiful without make up or clothes (regardless of how you feel about your body).  It is holding hands in the car or stealing kisses when you think no one is watching.

Romance is not dead, but it is not always glamorous or flashy.  It's the portrayal of higher emotion in actions.  It is sweetness and strength and memory building all the same time.  Look for romance and you will find it more places than you can imagine.

1 comment:

  1. Romance novels, romantic movies have ruined real has made it almost unattainable. One my favorite "romantic" gestures is when I'm being my dorky eccentric self and my hubby tells friends or family "Don't laugh at her" ;) Sweet Post!


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